Are your children resilient enough? The Power of Failure

The world we live in today is a goldfish bowl.

We have access to an instant world of information, entertainment, and social media. The entire world is watching, waiting to see our mistakes and offer judgement.

In this exposed environment, how are our young people supposed to build their resilience? 

We build resilience by first ”failing” and then trying again, often we need to try and try and try again before we get it right. The problem with the always-on connectivity is that every step we take is often open to public scrutiny. This can be paralysing. The fear of scrutiny can make it seem safer to do nothing. So we will never know just what we are capable of. And it can lead to many young people getting stuck in an anxiety trap.

Resilience is the key to so many aspects of life.........it gives us the ability to adapt successfully and recover from challenging life experiences.

The question we need to ask is: how do we protect our children from getting stuck in this trap? How do we give them the courage to tackle the world we live in today? A world that is vastly different to the world that I and, I am sure, most parents today grew up in.

We need to let our children know that it is ok to make a mistake or to get it wrong. I grew up riding horses, and one of my daughters is a rider too. I can clearly remember an instructor saying to her “you cannot be a good rider until you have fallen off.”

We do not build our resilience from falling off the horse, but rather by getting back on. We need to shake off the dust, think about why we fell off and what we can do differently to hopefully not fall off again. Realising that we can bounce back after the worst has happened is the part that builds resilience.

Now, we will most probably fall off again, but the chances are it will be a brand new mistake, and we’ll learn a new lesson. After numerous falls, my daughter and I have both developed resilience as riders. I am aware we will fall off again, but I am not overwhelmed by the thought of falling off, it does not frighten me to the point where I do not want to ride. It has most definitely taught us how to be better riders, more aware of the situation and what we are taking on. This makes us prepared and ready to handle situations in a calm and controlled manner. We do not panic if something goes wrong. We are very aware of the risks we are taking as we have taken them before.

As we watch our children grow up, how many of us do everything we can to protect them from tricky situations? Let me give you some examples: not getting into the team, or a position in the soccer team they felt was best for them? A friend that is being challenged (I am not talking about being bullied), trying something new, new school or teacher?

How many of us have either stepped in or allowed our children to avoid an uncomfortable situation?

Fill out the below form and a member of our team will be in touch.