Bonfire Night: Managing Excitement and Anxiety
For most bonfire night is a fun evening out and a chance for families to spend some time together to bond. However, bonfire night may seem quite different if you are a parent to an anxious child.
There are many elements of the 5th of November traditions that anxious children may find scary.
You might be unsure if your child is feeling apprehensive about the upcoming holiday. It can be hard to tell how they are feeling sometimes but try to look out for some signs, these could include your child going quiet when the topic of bonfire night is brought up or showing disinterest in participating in the celebrations.
Remember, negative memories from past experiences might arise, this can trigger their anxiety.
Bonfire night tends to draw crowds of people together, while you may see this as a sign of a community coming together, this is a very real fear for a lot of people.
A crowd can easily overwhelm a child through a fear of separation or claustrophobia – this feeling can be heightened for a child with anxiety. Keep in mind that this can be frightening for your child.
Fireworks may be a beautiful display, but the loud bangs can trigger anxiety. Potentially watching them from afar or buying a pack of sparklers to enjoy at home can be a more calming option.
Furthermore, funfairs are a fusion of different bright colours, flashing lights and loud music.
This can be overstimulating for anyone at the best of times, but if your child suffers from racing thoughts this can negatively impact how they are feeling, causing them to spiral.
In this already overwhelming environment, a young child may be confused about what this celebration is for and why we commemorate this day with these odd traditions.
In all fairness, a large bonfire and chants of burning a man at the stake are quite scary.
The best way to ensure your child is comfortable is to make sure they understand what is happening. If you explain to your child beforehand what this celebration is about and the resulting traditions this can reduce their confusion and worry.
Overall, one method to reduce anxiety on this day that can be an easier option and is more readily available is to give your child some control.
If you give your child control, or at least the feeling of control, they can feel more content and relaxed.
This can be done by providing them with options, for example; would you like to go to see the bonfire or would you just like to watch the fireworks? This way you have the ultimate control but your child can choose to do what they feel is most comfortable for them.
As always communication is key!
Talking to your child beforehand to see how they are feeling will help you to understand what they need. Listen to them and try to empathise with how they are feeling.
Explaining to them what will happen and giving them small choices will reduce confusion and impart the feeling of control, therefore reducing any anxious feelings they may be having.
A fun night might be the best way to enjoy the holiday.
Potentially the best option to celebrate the 5th of November without anxiety would be to stay at home with the family or invite a few friends over.
You could plan activities like baking autumnal treats, watching the fireworks displays from your home or making and decorating your own homemade lanterns.
This could be a better evening for your family and a way to have more entertainment with less anxiety.
